Objects of Their Desires
by 0RamblingRose0
Summary: Valentine's Day. Marauder Style.
1. Requests and Responses

Title: Object of Their Desire  
Author: LupinLovesTonks  
Rating: PG  
Disclaimer: I do not own nor claim any rights to Harry Potter. Harry Potter and all related characters are trademarked to J.K. Rowling. There is no profit coming to the author for use of these trademarked characters. Any resembalance to actual people or events is strictly coincidental.  
Summary: It's the day for spreading love at Hogwarts and the Marauders are excited about the prospect of finding out which girls fancy them and enlist the most artfully inclined member of their group to make Valentine's for the girls of their choice. But, the real contest is to see which of the Marauders will actually get the most valentine's sent to them.

* * *

_Date:_ 6791 ts13 yraunaJ  
_Time:_ ?serac ohw ,sumer yltsenoh ,ho  
_From: _rettoP semaJ  
_How many: _2 (total, not per girl like last time)  
_For: _Lily Evans, Narcissa Black 

_Special Requests:_

Lily's - Something pretty. glitter and other sparkly girly things a plus, but not required. maybe a little deer on the corner would be a nice touch (added bonus is if the little deer is laying in a bed of lilies, since i know lilies are your specialty when it comes to drawing flowers). Note should read: Wishing you would be my girlfriend, as always. Happy Valentine's Day. Love, James. PS: Now will you be my girlfriend?

iheard you possess the knowledge to place guilt charms on these things. if you still possess this wisdom, apply it to valentine so she will feel guilty for rejecting me so many times. :)

Narcissa - Something that she'll be able to look at herself in. needs to be charmed to make her see her cold black hearted self for who she really is upon second glance. charm message to shoot up in fireworks and follow her around for hours, maybe even days. Note should read: i'm a cold, heartless, bitch.

adding a little sparkly dog to hop around "bitch" would be a definate bonus. just makes sure it's something that will forever haunt and remind her that she left me for that snot nose prat Lucius! extra hexes a definate bonus. more so if they will effect Lucius too. or turn her into a guy. a really ugly guy.

with boils.

and hair sticking out her ears.

* * *

_Date:_ that one girl Lily's always around  
_Time: _what the...?  
_From: _The one, the only, Sirius Black.  
_How many: _4  
_For:_ Valentines Day, of course. 

_Special Requests:_

A few peices of chocolate should be in order.

I _think_ her name is Leigh. Not sure. I know it starts with either an "L" or a "P". Address it to "the beautiful dark eyed Ravenclaw" just to be safe. Enchant chocolate with high grade love spell since she hates me. Something with poetry, since you said "girls like that sort of thing". Just make sure it says how much I want to sweep her off her feet and teach her to put that anger she feels toward me to much better use ;)

I mean, honestly Rem, the girl is hot. Even Peter said so and you how he usually only fancies the weird girls. Then again, this lass isn't exactly what even _you_ would consider "normal"... Oh, and use different poems on each card.

* * *

_Date: _5 February 1976  
_Time: _close to midnight  
_From:_ "Wormtail"  
_How many: _1  
_For:_ Moaning Myrtle 

_Special Requests:_

Something to make her feel special so she'll quit moping about. Perhaps a picture of her that makes her see how pretty she is. A live flower on the card would be most appreciated. After all, it would be nice to see her smile for once.

888

_James._

_Sparkly things and glitter a go. Little deer a go. Guilt charm a no go. Should cost me around 5 sickles to make. This is including labour for the drawing I'll have to do by hand and the application of sparkles and glitter._

_Will get to work on Narcissa's straight away, since this will prove to be most complicated card I will have ever made. However, profanity is not allowed on any of the cards I make this year due to the fact I do not wish lose my prefect duties. So, roughly, this means I will find out how to spell "bitch" in a different language. I hear Atlantian isn't known by any of the professors so that may be the one I use._

_Normally a card of this magnitude would cost the sender about 20 sickles. But for you, my friend, I will gladly do it for free._

_By the way, who told you I knew how to do that charm?_

_love._

_Remus._

_PS: Capitalization of the letters, where needed, in sentences is a courtesy most educated people admire.  
PPS: Not to mention the backwards writing is "gniyonna"._

* * *

_Mr. Black_

_I am most pleased that you have sent me a reasonable request for once. I almost didn't get done with the, roughly, 60 cards you wanted me to do last year. Enclosed are 6 poems I like to use on cards for people in your precarious situation. Please choose four and return them to me in enclosed envelope. Love Spells are illegal. A mild affection charm, however, is not._

_A side note: The girl's name is Abigal... It's her cousin's, best friend's, sister's, daughter's friend that is named Leigh._

_And are you sure you want to chance that one? Lily told me she's into all sorts of SM type things, so I worry she may be far above your reach. But don't feel special, Abigal hates guys in general. Her only desire is to beat them into submission. I know this because I actually asked after recieveing your request._

_As for weird... Honestly, Sirius, the girl is the definition of weird. And what's "this lass isn't exactly what even you would consider 'normal'" supposed to be implying Mr. Black? Are you implying that I'm not normal? I take this as a personal insult. An insult which I will remind you of until the day you die. In fact, if I die before you, I will make it a point to haunt you and continue reminding you._

_All that said, it will cost me about 5 sickles to make each card. That brings your total (with that lovely Black Tax, which came into effect when I became insulted, included) to 50 sickles. (price also reflects the price for chocolate you stole from me last week)._

_love._

_Remus_

* * *

_Peter._

_Sometimes we wonder about you mate. Really._

_love._

_Remus_

_PS: will cost only 2 sickles because I really really feel sorry for you.

* * *

AN: More coming soon._


	2. The Blundering Idiot

Title: Object of Their Desire  
Author: LupinLovesTonks  
Rating: G  
Warning: Some occasional language.  
Disclaimer: I do not own nor claim any rights to Harry Potter. Harry Potter and all related characters are trademarked to J.K. Rowling. There is no profit coming to the author for use of these trademarked characters. Any resembalance to actual people or events is strictly coincidental.  
Summary: It's the day for spreading love at Hogwarts and the Marauders are excited about the prospect of finding out which girls fancy them and enlist the most artfully inclined member of their group to make Valentine's for the girls of their choice. But, the real contest is to see which of the Marauders will actually get the most valentine's sent to them

AN: Yeah just a teeny note here... For some, unknown and ungodly reason, I have a fixation with having Sirius mercilesslytease James about being pretty. Don't ask where it came from, I just don't know.

* * *

Chapter One - James

* * *

"Don't open it James, unless you really want a little dog bouncing around your head for two days or you want to be turned into a girl," Remus warned. "Which, then the person getting it would know who sent it to her."

"I actually think I'd make a cute girl," James smirked.

"Well, we all know you don't make a cute _boy_," Sirius teased. "How much did you make this year anyways Remus?"

"I made enough to get at least four new school robes or two new dress robes," Remus boasted. "Or, lets just say, enough to buy a few months worth of chocolate frogs." He looked in the little bag he had collected his funds in. "Hmm, maybe even a years worth." He shook his head. "But, I already have a use for this money so don't start asking me to supply you lot with butterbeers for a week."

James and Sirius exchanged a look then looked back at Remus.

"Could it be?" Sirius gapped. "_Our Remus_, has plans to spend everything he earned this year, on a gift for a girl?"

"Oh, come off it," Remus scoffed. "It's just a little something for a fellow prefect. Purely in a friendly manner and without any sort of insinuations toward wanting to be something other than her friend."

"In other words it's a gift that you know she'll like and would have probably expected from her boyfriend?" James asked. "_But_ you fancy the girl and just won't admit it."

Remus' nostrils flared slightly and he got a grave look on his face. This could only mean one thing and one thing only, James knew. It meant him and Sirius were right and Remus was just annoyed by the fact they had figured it out.

"By the way," James asked. "Have any of you lot figured out who you were going to ask to this little... Valentine's Day occasion Dumbledore invented? I already know I'm, of course, asking Evans. And I don't want to hear that she'll turn me down because after she reads this _awesomely_ incredible card Remus did up, there will be no way that she will be able to turn me down."

James grinned and admired the second card. Unlike the one for Narcissa, Lily's was not made of a reflective material, instead the card was enchanted to look like rather nicely done forest setting with a solitary lily by a stream. James felt somewhat jealous of the little fawn sniffing at the lily. He was jealous because he was unable to draw something of that magnitude, heck, he was only good at drawing the balls from Quidditch and an occasional tree or broom.

He touched his wand to Narcissa's and muttered her name and it disappeared. "Hers should be arriving momentarily, hopefully she'll wait until tomorrow to open it with the others that'll be arriving at luncheon. I'm going to go and give Evans her's right now so I can see how she just melts into a little puddle of giddiness when she reads it."

"Something tells me it'll be more of a puddle of tears from laughing," Sirius smirked, nudging Remus. "Right mate?"

Remus muttered soemthing under his breath and walked away.

James snorted slightly. "What's his problem?"

"Don't worry about it James. You know how much he hates Valentine's Day, no one ever sends him anything except his mum. Maybe me, you, and Peter should get together and make something for him to just let him know we appreciate his work and his friendship."

"Nah-uh, Valentine's Day is for _lovers_," James boasted. "And I already get that insinuation enough about Peter and you, so I don't need to start one up for Remus as well. I'm off."

"You just now realized that fact yourself?" Sirius snickered. "Keep the mirror open alright? Peter and I have a bet going that once you get Lily alone that you'll turn into a blundering idiot and won't be able to ask her out."

James acted insulted. "_Me? Moi?_ A blundering idiot? Never."

"Right," Sirius said slowly. "We've seen what happens when you manage to get her on your own. Pensieve's gotta love em. Good luck at any rate."

James inhaled deeply and walked off in search of Lily. He found her, sitting by herself, under a tree, reading. As soon as he noticed she was alone he felt his heart drop to his stomach and his stomach seemed to drop to his feet. _No, no_, he told himself. If he could do this in front of others, surely he could do it with no one else around to witness it.

He took another deep breath and strode purposefully over to Lily. She looked up at him and frowned slightly.

"What?" she said flatly.

James had meant to say, "You lovely today, Lily" with his self-assured tone. Instead, he opened and closed his mouth several times before saying, with an idiotic tone, "You're so pretty." He closed his eyes, sighed heavily and dropped his head with shame.

Lily blinked several times and almost looked amused. "Thanks," she said with a slight grin. "What can I do for you James? I was a bit engrossed with this book before you came over."

Far beyond any sort of salvation from looking like an idiot, James just held the card out toward Lily and mumbled, "For you."

For a moment, Lily looked perplexed but took the card and opened it after admiring the cover art. "Thank you James, it's lovely. Did Remus help you out with this?" James shook his head violently. "No? Oh, hm, perhaps I misjudged you then. Because not many people would know I greatly admire the works of Longfellow. Do you enjoy his poetry as well then?"

James startled slightly. _Who the hell is Longfellow?_ "Yeah, yeah... of course I do. Longfellow is, I swear, the greatest." He gave a nervous smile. "I have to go now." He hurried off before Lily could say anything else.

Once back in the safety of his dormitory, James commenced beating his head against the wall next to his bed. It wasn't long before the other Marauders came in, looking rather pleased with themselves. Upon seeing him beating his head against the wall, Sirius burst into laughter.

"You became a blundering idiot didn't you?" Sirius laughed. "Pitiful I tell ya, the lad needs other people around in order to function properly around Lily. That's rather saddening mate."

James scowled and shot a hex at Sirius, which made him crumble onto the floor in pain. Ah well, he could always ask her later. And this time he would make sure she had a friend around and he had all his friends around. That way he could get the words out.


End file.
